Who's awesome? You're awesome.

Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind had something special with their magical "make me forget" machine. How easy would it make things if you could just pay someone to remove something, or someone from your brain? Instant relief from whatever pain it, or they, are causing you; not to mention without any of those memories you would be hard pressed to even regret your decision to have them removed.

But the world doesn't work that way. Instead, you have to man up to things or let them take over. You have to learn to move on or learn to acknowledge and accept. Unfortunately with an over-analytical brain and maybe someone on your mind it seems like a task that feels anything but possible. The truth is nothing is impossible, but there are definitely factors that will contribute to the difficulty.

So what's the secret?

"Those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind."

"Fall down seven times stand up eight."

"There's only one thing you need to know about life: it goes on."

There are a million motivational quotes out there that claim to be the key to restoring the balance. However, the truth is these quotes are so idealistic that it almost makes you wanna puke. I try to be a glass half full kinda guy, but there comes a time where the mess in my brain and the pain in my chest gets the better of me. So what do I do?

My friends, the only thing that has ever truly worked for me as far as combating the self-loathing is diverting my focus onto others. I know I'm not as wonderful as I jokingly brag about all the time, but I do know that many of the people in my life are. If I can get someone believe in themselves half as much as I do, that's kinda a big deal. If I can help someone defeat one of their demons I sleep easier. It's almost like it gives me confirmation that it can happen, and maybe sometime I'll be able to do the same.

Ironically I guess my tendency to be selfless stems from selfish reasoning. Maybe after doing all this good the powers that be will decide I deserve something. I mean, truly, I have a great life with great friends, but this head of mine has a bit of a defect I think and if I earn enough karma points maybe I can get it fixed. Who knows? Of that I can't be sure, but it's worth a shot.

What a messy post, but hopefully you get the drift :)